Lena Servin Lena Servin

Bridging the Gap

Family estrangement is often whispered about but rarely understood. When adult children distance themselves from their parents, it’s easy for outsiders to judge: "Why can’t they just forgive and move on?" But the reality is far more complex. Estrangement is rarely about a lack of love—it’s about a lack of repair.

A Compassionate Approach to Family Healing

Family estrangement is often whispered about but rarely understood. When adult children distance themselves from their parents, it’s easy for outsiders to judge: "Why can’t they just forgive and move on?" But the reality is far more complex. Estrangement is rarely about a lack of love—it’s about a lack of repair.

In the words of trauma expert Dr. Gabor Maté, “The attempt to escape from pain creates more pain.” For many adult children, distance becomes the only way to protect themselves when repeated attempts at connection lead to more hurt.

But what if healing were possible—on both sides?

Why Estrangement Happens

Estrangement doesn’t usually stem from one isolated event. Instead, it often grows from years of unmet needs, invalidated feelings, and unresolved pain.

Common reasons include:

1. Unacknowledged Hurt

When an adult child says, “You hurt me,” and the response is, “I did the best I could,” the conversation stops before healing can begin. Dr. Brené Brown reminds us that “empathy fuels connection, while defensiveness shuts it down.”

2. Parents Still Seeing Adult Children as Children

Many parents unconsciously view their adult children through the lens of who they were decades ago. This perspective can make it difficult for parents to recognize the validity of their child's experiences. Criticism of parenting choices is often perceived as ingratitude, rather than an adult child's effort to understand their own emotional wounds.

Dr. Gabor Maté explains that "children don't get traumatized because they are hurt; they get traumatized because they're alone with the hurt." When adult children express long-held pain, they’re often seeking acknowledgment, not condemnation of their parents. Yet, if parents remain stuck in seeing their children as "ungrateful kids" rather than autonomous adults with complex emotions, meaningful dialogue becomes nearly impossible.

3. The Danger of Shutting Down Instead of Getting Curious

When parents respond to their child's pain with phrases like, "You're always bringing up the past," or "I can't believe you don't appreciate everything I did," they unintentionally reinforce the very dynamic that led to the estrangement.

Dr. Peter Levine, founder of Somatic Experiencing, highlights that "trauma is not what happens to us, but what we hold inside in the absence of an empathetic witness." Without curiosity and compassion, both sides remain stuck in defensive postures, deepening the divide.

Healing starts when parents approach their adult child’s experiences with curiosity rather than defensiveness. Instead of "Why are you attacking me?" they might ask, "Can you help me understand how that experience affected you?" This shift opens the door to repair.

The Cycle of Disconnection

Here’s what often happens in strained parent-child relationships:

  1. The Child Expresses Pain: “You hurt me.”

  2. The Parent Feels Blamed: “I did my best.”

  3. The Child Feels Invalidated: “You’re not hearing me.”

  4. The Parent Shuts Down: “Why can’t you just move on?”

Eventually, the adult child withdraws—not out of spite, but out of exhaustion. As Dr. Levine explains, “When the body and mind perceive continued threat with no resolution, shutdown becomes the only survival strategy.”

Breaking the Cycle: Healing for Both Sides

Healing requires willingness from both sides. Here’s how parents and adult children can begin repairing the divide:

For Parents: Listening Without Defensiveness

  1. Acknowledge the Hurt: Instead of "I didn’t mean to," try "I'm sorry I hurt you, even if it wasn’t my intention."

  2. Stay Curious: Ask, "Can you help me understand what that experience was like for you?"

  3. Respect Boundaries: When a child sets a boundary, it’s not rejection—it’s self-preservation.

When parents get curious instead of defensive, it signals safety. It tells the adult child, "Your experience matters to me, even if it's hard for me to hear." This simple shift can transform a conversation from conflict to connection.

For Adult Children: Speaking Your Truth Compassionately

  1. Be Clear but Kind: "I'm sharing this because I want us to have a healthier relationship."

  2. Focus on Impact, Not Blame: "When this happened, I felt…" rather than "You always…"

  3. Know When to Step Back: If the conversation becomes harmful, it’s okay to pause.

The Role of Self-Healing

Sometimes, reconciliation isn’t immediately possible. In these cases, individual healing becomes even more important.

  • For Parents: Reflect on your own upbringing. What patterns are you unknowingly repeating? As Dr. Bruce Perry notes, "Hurt people hurt people." Healing yourself creates space for healthier relationships.

  • For Adult Children: Practice self-compassion. Therapy, breathwork, and somatic practices can help release long-held pain.

Reconciliation Isn’t Always the Goal—Peace Is

It’s important to remember: reconciliation is not always possible, nor is it always safe. The true goal is peace—whether that means rebuilding the relationship or finding closure within yourself.

As Brené Brown beautifully puts it: “True belonging doesn’t require you to change who you are; it requires you to be who you are.”

Ready to Start the Healing Journey?

If you’re navigating family estrangement, healing is possible—whether together or apart. To support your journey, we’ve created a free PDF guide: "Bridging the Gap: A Compassionate Approach to Family Healing."

👉 Download Your Free Guide Here

It includes reflective journaling prompts, boundary-setting tips, and communication strategies to help you navigate tough conversations with clarity and compassion.

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Lena Servin Lena Servin

The Space Between Who I Was and Who I’m Becoming

In a world rushing for clarity, there’s power in the pause. This blog explores the tender space between identities, divine discontent, and how Serenity Cove can support your becoming

There’s a quiet ache that many of us are feeling right now.

Not a crisis.
Not a breakdown.
But a low hum of divine discontent — a restless, soul-level whisper that says: This isn’t it anymore.

I’ve been moving through this space myself.
A liminal stretch where the roles I once played don’t feel aligned, but the next version of me hasn’t fully landed either.
A space where I’m not who I used to be — but not yet who I’m becoming.

And I’ve learned that this space isn’t a mistake.
It’s the threshold of transformation.

The Psychology + Spirituality of Divine Discontent

In psychological terms, this discomfort is often described as “identity dissonance” — when your inner self begins to outgrow the life you’ve built. What once brought you satisfaction no longer fits. And while it’s not depression, it can feel like a quiet emptiness. A sense of misalignment.

In spiritual language, this is often called divine discontent — the soul’s way of nudging us out of old cycles and into greater alignment with truth, purpose, and possibility.

Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estés speaks to this in Women Who Run With the Wolves, calling it “the call from the wild soul” — the part of us that refuses to stay asleep in a life that no longer reflects our essence.

It’s a sacred discomfort.
An initiation.

The Collective Pulse: You’re Not Alone

What’s wild is how many people I’m hearing this from lately:
Clients. Friends. Strangers in my inbox.

  • “I don’t know who I am anymore.”

  • “I’ve outgrown so much, but I don’t know what’s next.”

  • “I’m craving something deeper. Truer. But I feel so lost.”

This is the collective pulse of a world in transition.
Old systems are crumbling. Outdated roles are dissolving.
And underneath it all, more of us are awakening to the truth that… more is possible.

More presence.
More authenticity.
More ease.
More aligned, soul-honoring ways of being.

But first… we sit in the space between.

My Own Becoming

Lately, I’ve been shedding so much — not just on a practical level, but energetically.
Old stories. Old ways of earning love. Old definitions of success.

I’ve cried on the floor, questioned my purpose, made scary decisions, and taken long pauses in nature with no answers at all. And still, something in me knows…

This isn’t a step backward.
It’s a sacred pause.

The soil must soften before new roots take hold.

If You’re Here Too…

If you’re in that in-between — the cocoon, the pause, the not-quite-anymore-and-not-yet — I want you to know this:

✨ You are not broken.
✨ You are not late.
✨ You are not lost.

You are becoming.

Ask Yourself…

  • What version of me am I being asked to release — with love?

  • Where in my life am I forcing clarity instead of trusting timing?

  • What might become possible if I softened into the not-knowing?

  • Who do I want to be on the other side of this becoming?

  • How can I let this discomfort be a doorway instead of a dead end?

Serenity Cove: A Sanctuary for the In-Between

At Serenity Cove, we hold space for the middle.
For the unraveling. The rediscovery. The return.

Whether it's through breathwork, Lucia Light, vibroacoustic sound, or simply quiet time in nature — this is a place to remember yourself. Not because you have it all figured out… but because you’re finally allowing yourself to feel it all.

You don’t need to arrive to be worthy of rest.
You don’t need to have the answers to be received.

Come as you are.
There’s space for you here.


Lena

An Invitation to Drop In

Ready to soften into your becoming?
Book a private session, attend a breathwork event, or spend time reconnecting with your soul at Serenity Cove.
Let the in-between be sacred.

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Lena Servin Lena Servin

The Rising Value of Life Coaching

In a world filled with self-help books, therapy sessions, and personal development courses, life coaching has emerged as a powerful, transformational tool that is changing lives.

Why It Works When Other Methods Don’t

In a world filled with self-help books, therapy sessions, and personal development courses, life coaching has emerged as a powerful, transformational tool that is changing lives. Unlike traditional approaches, life coaching offers a unique, forward-focused methodology that is helping people overcome obstacles, find clarity, and achieve personal and professional breakthroughs. But what makes life coaching so valuable, and why does it work for so many when other methods fall short?

The Power of Life Coaching

Life coaching stands out because it bridges the gap between awareness and action. While therapy often focuses on past traumas and unresolved emotions, coaching is primarily solution-driven, helping individuals take control of their present and shape their future. Coaches provide the structure, guidance, and accountability needed to create tangible, lasting change.

Some key reasons why life coaching works:

  1. Personalized Strategy: Coaching is not a one-size-fits-all approach. A good coach tailors their methods to fit an individual’s goals, challenges, and personality, ensuring an effective and personalized journey.

  2. Action-Oriented Approach: Unlike passive forms of self-help, coaching encourages immediate application of insights and tools, leading to real-world progress.

  3. Accountability & Support: Coaches serve as partners in personal transformation, offering consistent check-ins, feedback, and encouragement to keep clients on track.

  4. Mindset Shifts & Empowerment: Life coaches help clients break through limiting beliefs and develop a mindset that supports success and fulfillment.

  5. Practical Tools & Techniques: Many coaches integrate methods from various disciplines, including psychology, neuroscience, and mindfulness, offering clients a well-rounded approach to growth.

Why Coaching Works When Other Methods Fail

While therapy and self-help methods are incredibly valuable, they don’t always provide the structure or action steps needed for certain individuals to move forward. Some reasons coaching succeeds where other approaches don’t include:

  • Future-Focused Mentality: Coaching is designed to help individuals move beyond obstacles and create a vision for their ideal life rather than dwelling on past struggles.

  • Personalized Accountability: Many people struggle with self-motivation. Having a coach ensures they follow through on their commitments and progress steadily.

  • Holistic Approach: Coaches often incorporate diverse tools like breathwork, visualization, goal-setting techniques, and mindset training to create comprehensive transformation.

  • Direct & Supportive Feedback: Coaches challenge limiting perspectives and help clients push past comfort zones, leading to deep personal evolution.

How to Choose the Right Life Coach

With the rise in coaching’s popularity, finding the right coach is crucial. Here are some key considerations when choosing a coach:

  1. Define Your Goals: Are you looking for career guidance, emotional healing, or overall life transformation? Identifying your needs will help you find a coach with the right expertise.

  2. Look for Alignment: A coach’s philosophy should align with your values and vision. Follow their content, testimonials, and client success stories to gauge compatibility.

  3. Check Credentials & Experience: While certification isn’t always necessary, experience, proven results, and a strong understanding of human psychology and transformation methods are crucial.

  4. Assess Their Coaching Style: Some coaches are direct and challenging, while others are nurturing and intuitive. Determine which style resonates with you.

  5. Schedule a Consultation: Most coaches offer a discovery call. Use this opportunity to assess their approach and energy to see if it’s a good fit.

  6. Trust Your Intuition: The best coaching relationships are built on trust and connection. If you feel aligned with a coach’s energy and methods, it’s a good sign they’re the right fit for you.

Final Thoughts

Life coaching is more than just a trend—it’s a transformational tool that is helping countless individuals step into their full potential. Whether you’re feeling stuck, seeking clarity, or striving for a breakthrough, the right coach can be the catalyst for your greatest transformation. By choosing a coach who aligns with your needs and vision, you’re taking a powerful step toward a more fulfilling and empowered life.

The Effectiveness of Life Coaching

  1. Improved Well-Being and Goal Attainment: A meta-analysis published in the Journal of Positive Psychologyfound that life coaching significantly enhances performance, well-being, coping skills, and work attitudes.
    eclipselifecoaching.com

  2. Enhanced Mental Health: Research indicates that life coaching can lead to significant improvements in mental health, including reduced depression and anxiety, as well as increased quality of life and goal attainment.
    researchgate.net

  3. Positive Impact on Health Outcomes: A systematic review published in the International Journal of Evidence Based Coaching and Mentoring concluded that life coaching positively affects various health outcomes, such as improved quality of life and decreased psychological distress.
    pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

Why Life Coaching Succeeds Where Other Methods May Not

  • Action-Oriented and Future-Focused: Life coaching emphasizes actionable strategies and future goals, distinguishing it from traditional therapeutic approaches that often focus on past experiences.
    lifecoachtraining.co

  • Personalized Support and Accountability: Coaches provide tailored guidance and hold clients accountable, fostering sustained motivation and progress.
    wetrainlifecoaches.com

Choosing the Right Life Coach

When selecting a life coach, consider the following:

  1. Specialization: Identify coaches who specialize in areas aligning with your specific goals, whether it's career development, personal growth, or health.
    noomii.com

  2. Credentials and Training: While the coaching industry is not universally regulated, seeking coaches with recognized certifications or substantial training can ensure a higher standard of practice.
    apaththatfits.com

  3. Personal Compatibility: A strong rapport and shared values between you and your coach are crucial for a successful coaching relationship.
    lifecoachspotter.com

  4. Proven Track Record: Look for testimonials, case studies, or reviews that demonstrate the coach's effectiveness and experience.
    apaththatfits.com

Read More
Lena Servin Lena Servin

The Rising Value of Life Coaching

Life coaching is quickly becoming one of the most impactful tools for personal growth—especially when other methods fall short. This blog explores why coaching works, what makes it different from therapy or self-help, and how to find the right coach to guide your transformation.

Why It Works When Other Methods Don’t

In a world filled with self-help books, therapy sessions, and personal development courses, life coaching has emerged as a powerful, transformational tool that is changing lives. Unlike traditional approaches, life coaching offers a unique, forward-focused methodology that is helping people overcome obstacles, find clarity, and achieve personal and professional breakthroughs. But what makes life coaching so valuable, and why does it work for so many when other methods fall short?

The Power of Life Coaching

Life coaching stands out because it bridges the gap between awareness and action. While therapy often focuses on past traumas and unresolved emotions, coaching is primarily solution-driven, helping individuals take control of their present and shape their future. Coaches provide the structure, guidance, and accountability needed to create tangible, lasting change.

Some key reasons why life coaching works:

  1. Personalized Strategy: Coaching is not a one-size-fits-all approach. A good coach tailors their methods to fit an individual’s goals, challenges, and personality, ensuring an effective and personalized journey.

  2. Action-Oriented Approach: Unlike passive forms of self-help, coaching encourages immediate application of insights and tools, leading to real-world progress.

  3. Accountability & Support: Coaches serve as partners in personal transformation, offering consistent check-ins, feedback, and encouragement to keep clients on track.

  4. Mindset Shifts & Empowerment: Life coaches help clients break through limiting beliefs and develop a mindset that supports success and fulfillment.

  5. Practical Tools & Techniques: Many coaches integrate methods from various disciplines, including psychology, neuroscience, and mindfulness, offering clients a well-rounded approach to growth.

Why Coaching Works When Other Methods Fail

While therapy and self-help methods are incredibly valuable, they don’t always provide the structure or action steps needed for certain individuals to move forward. Some reasons coaching succeeds where other approaches don’t include:

  • Future-Focused Mentality: Coaching is designed to help individuals move beyond obstacles and create a vision for their ideal life rather than dwelling on past struggles.

  • Personalized Accountability: Many people struggle with self-motivation. Having a coach ensures they follow through on their commitments and progress steadily.

  • Holistic Approach: Coaches often incorporate diverse tools like breathwork, visualization, goal-setting techniques, and mindset training to create comprehensive transformation.

  • Direct & Supportive Feedback: Coaches challenge limiting perspectives and help clients push past comfort zones, leading to deep personal evolution.

How to Choose the Right Life Coach

With the rise in coaching’s popularity, finding the right coach is crucial. Here are some key considerations when choosing a coach:

  1. Define Your Goals: Are you looking for career guidance, emotional healing, or overall life transformation? Identifying your needs will help you find a coach with the right expertise.

  2. Look for Alignment: A coach’s philosophy should align with your values and vision. Follow their content, testimonials, and client success stories to gauge compatibility.

  3. Check Credentials & Experience: While certification isn’t always necessary, experience, proven results, and a strong understanding of human psychology and transformation methods are crucial.

  4. Assess Their Coaching Style: Some coaches are direct and challenging, while others are nurturing and intuitive. Determine which style resonates with you.

  5. Schedule a Consultation: Most coaches offer a discovery call. Use this opportunity to assess their approach and energy to see if it’s a good fit.

  6. Trust Your Intuition: The best coaching relationships are built on trust and connection. If you feel aligned with a coach’s energy and methods, it’s a good sign they’re the right fit for you.

Final Thoughts

Life coaching is more than just a trend—it’s a transformational tool that is helping countless individuals step into their full potential. Whether you’re feeling stuck, seeking clarity, or striving for a breakthrough, the right coach can be the catalyst for your greatest transformation. By choosing a coach who aligns with your needs and vision, you’re taking a powerful step toward a more fulfilling and empowered life.

The Effectiveness of Life Coaching

  1. Improved Well-Being and Goal Attainment: A meta-analysis published in the Journal of Positive Psychologyfound that life coaching significantly enhances performance, well-being, coping skills, and work attitudes.
    eclipselifecoaching.com

  2. Enhanced Mental Health: Research indicates that life coaching can lead to significant improvements in mental health, including reduced depression and anxiety, as well as increased quality of life and goal attainment.
    researchgate.net

  3. Positive Impact on Health Outcomes: A systematic review published in the International Journal of Evidence Based Coaching and Mentoring concluded that life coaching positively affects various health outcomes, such as improved quality of life and decreased psychological distress.
    pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

Why Life Coaching Succeeds Where Other Methods May Not

  • Action-Oriented and Future-Focused: Life coaching emphasizes actionable strategies and future goals, distinguishing it from traditional therapeutic approaches that often focus on past experiences.
    lifecoachtraining.co

  • Personalized Support and Accountability: Coaches provide tailored guidance and hold clients accountable, fostering sustained motivation and progress.
    wetrainlifecoaches.com

Choosing the Right Life Coach

When selecting a life coach, consider the following:

  1. Specialization: Identify coaches who specialize in areas aligning with your specific goals, whether it's career development, personal growth, or health.
    noomii.com

  2. Credentials and Training: While the coaching industry is not universally regulated, seeking coaches with recognized certifications or substantial training can ensure a higher standard of practice.
    apaththatfits.com

  3. Personal Compatibility: A strong rapport and shared values between you and your coach are crucial for a successful coaching relationship.
    lifecoachspotter.com

  4. Proven Track Record: Look for testimonials, case studies, or reviews that demonstrate the coach's effectiveness and experience.
    apaththatfits.com

Read More
Lena Servin Lena Servin

The Healing Power of Expanded States of Consciousness

Expanded states of consciousness refer to altered mental and energetic states where perception shifts beyond ordinary awareness. These states can be accessed through practices such as breathwork, meditation, sound healing, plant medicine, the Lucia Light No. 3, and deep flow states in activities like dance or creative expression.

In today’s fast-paced world, stress, anxiety, and overwhelm have become the norm for many. Our nervous systems are constantly bombarded with stimuli, leading to chronic dysregulation, emotional imbalances, and even physical ailments. Yet, there is a profound antidote found in expanded states of consciousness—a gateway to healing, nervous system regulation, and deeper well-being. But how exactly does accessing these altered states benefit us?

Understanding Expanded States of Consciousness

Expanded states of consciousness refer to altered mental and energetic states where perception shifts beyond ordinary awareness. These states can be accessed through practices such as breathwork, meditation, sound healing, plant medicine, the Lucia Light No. 3, and deep flow states in activities like dance or creative expression.

When we enter these states, the brain shifts from its default mode of high-beta activity (associated with stress and overthinking) to alpha, theta, and even gamma waves, allowing for deep relaxation, heightened intuition, and expanded awareness.

The Nervous System and Healing Through Expansion

The nervous system has two primary modes:

  1. Sympathetic (Fight-or-Flight): Activated during stress, triggering survival responses.

  2. Parasympathetic (Rest-and-Digest): Engaged during relaxation and healing.

Many people operate predominantly in fight-or-flight, leading to chronic stress, anxiety, and nervous system dysregulation. Expanded states of consciousness help shift the nervous system into a parasympathetic-dominant state, allowing deep restoration, balance, and healing to occur.

Key Benefits for the Nervous System

  • Calms Overactive Stress Responses: Practices like deep breathwork and meditation slow the heart rate, lower cortisol, and signal safety to the brain.

  • Rewires Trauma Responses: Accessing subconscious memories in a safe, expanded state allows unprocessed trauma to be integrated and released.

  • Increases Neuroplasticity: The brain becomes more adaptable, forming new neural pathways that promote emotional resilience and inner peace.

  • Regulates the Vagus Nerve: A key player in the nervous system, the vagus nerve controls relaxation, digestion, and overall balance. Expanded states naturally stimulate vagal tone, improving well-being.

Stress Reduction and Emotional Healing

Beyond physiological benefits, these states provide profound relief from emotional and mental stress:

  • Breaks Negative Thought Loops: Many of us get stuck in repetitive patterns of worry, self-doubt, or fear. Altered states interrupt these cycles, creating space for new perspectives.

  • Enhances Emotional Release: Suppressed emotions often emerge in these states, allowing for cathartic healing and release.

  • Boosts Serotonin and Dopamine: Many practices linked to expanded states (like meditation and light therapy) naturally increase feel-good neurotransmitters, supporting a balanced mood.

  • Connects Us to Inner Wisdom: When the ego mind quiets, we gain access to deeper intuition, insight, and self-awareness.

Additional Benefits of Expanded Awareness

Aside from healing the nervous system and reducing stress, accessing expanded consciousness provides:

  • Heightened Creativity: Artists, writers, and innovators often tap into altered states to access inspiration and visionary thinking.

  • A Sense of Interconnectedness: Feelings of unity, love, and deep connection to nature and the universe arise, fostering compassion and purpose.

  • Deepened Meditation and Mindfulness: These states make it easier to enter deep meditative absorption, strengthening presence in daily life.

  • Better Sleep and Energy Levels: As stress reduces and nervous system balance is restored, sleep quality improves, and natural energy increases.

How to Access Expanded States for Healing

If you’re seeking to regulate your nervous system, reduce stress, and invite healing through expanded consciousness, consider exploring:

  • Breathwork Journeys: Somatic release breathwork helps clear stored tension and regulate emotions.

  • Lucia Light No. 3 Sessions: This hypnagogic light experience stimulates deep relaxation and visionary states.

  • Meditation & Sound Healing: Binaural beats, drumming, and chanting entrain the brain into healing frequencies.

  • Psychedelic-Assisted Healing: (Where legal) Certain plant medicines offer profound shifts in awareness and emotional release.

  • Nature Immersion: Ecstatic dance, hiking, and floating in water naturally induce expanded awareness.

Final Thoughts

Tapping into expanded states of consciousness is not just about having mystical experiences—it’s a deeply healing process that allows the body, mind, and spirit to reset, regulate, and realign. As science continues to validate the therapeutic potential of these states, more people are discovering how inner expansion leads to profound emotional freedom, nervous system healing, and stress relief.

If you’ve experienced healing through altered states, we’d love to hear your insights! Share your journey in the comments below.

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Lena Servin Lena Servin

Coming Home to Yourself

Coming Home to Yourself: The Journey of Self-Love and Rediscovery

There comes a moment in life when you realize that the person you have been waiting for—the one who will truly see you, honor you, and love you unconditionally—has been with you all along. It is you.

The Journey of Self-Love and Rediscovery

There comes a moment in life when you realize that the person you have been waiting for—the one who will truly see you, honor you, and love you unconditionally—has been with you all along. It is you.

For many, self-love feels like an elusive concept, something talked about in books and on social media but difficult to embody in real life. We chase relationships, achievements, and external validation, believing they will offer the sense of wholeness we crave. But there is an undeniable truth: the deepest healing happens when we turn inward.

The Struggle to Return to Ourselves

As a coach, I often hear variations of the same story: “I feel like I’ve lost myself.” Whether it’s through years of caregiving, bending to expectations, or chasing love from those who cannot fully offer it, many people wake up one day feeling disconnected from their own essence.

This is not failure. This is the invitation.

Losing ourselves is often part of the journey because it allows us to find ourselves in a way we never could before—this time, with awareness, intention, and deep self-compassion. It is a remembering.

The Grief and Beauty of Self-Rediscovery

Coming back to yourself is not always easy. There is grief in realizing how long you have abandoned your needs. There may be sadness in seeing where you have accepted less than you deserve. But alongside that grief, there is also an incredible beauty—the beauty of returning home.

Self-love is not about perfection. It is not about standing in front of the mirror reciting affirmations you don’t believe. It is about becoming the one who stays. The one who listens. The one who chooses, again and again, to be gentle with themselves.

Practical Steps to Reconnect with Yourself

If you are in the process of rediscovering yourself, here are a few steps that can help:

  1. Meet Yourself With Compassion. Speak to yourself the way you would a dear friend who is learning something new. Self-criticism keeps you stuck; self-compassion moves you forward.

  2. Honor Your Desires. What do you actually want? Not what you should want, but what truly brings you peace, joy, and fulfillment? Let this be your compass.

  3. Practice Small Acts of Self-Belonging. Whether it’s setting a boundary, journaling, or simply placing your hand over your heart and whispering, I am here with you, these moments matter.

  4. Grieve What Needs to Be Grieved. If you have spent years abandoning yourself, there may be sadness. Let yourself feel it without judgment. Healing requires witnessing the hurt, not bypassing it.

  5. Recommit Daily. Some days will be easier than others. That’s okay. Self-love is not a finish line; it’s a relationship. And like any relationship, it requires attention, care, and patience.

The Reunion of a Lifetime

Derek Walcott’s poem Love After Love so beautifully captures this moment—the sacred reunion with the self.

"You will love again the stranger who was yourself.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart to itself."

You are not a project to be fixed. You are a home to return to.

And no matter how far you have wandered, you are always welcome back.

Are You Ready to Reconnect With Yourself?

If this message resonates with you, I invite you to go deeper with your self-love journey:

  • Experience a Private Breathwork Session – Join me for a guided breathwork experience designed to help you release old patterns and reconnect with your true essence. [Sign up here!]

You are worthy of love, especially your own. And no matter where you are on this journey, you are not alone.

I’d love to hear your thoughts—what does self-love mean to you? Drop a comment or share your reflections with me.


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Lena Servin Lena Servin

Exploring Expanded States of Consciousness with the Lucia Light No. 3

The Lucia Light No. 3 is a hypnagogic light device designed to induce deep meditative states, altered consciousness, and visionary experiences through a combination of solid and flickering white light.

In our quest for deeper self-awareness, healing, and personal evolution, the exploration of expanded states of consciousness has become an increasingly sought-after experience. While traditional practices such as meditation, breathwork, and plant medicine have long been revered as gateways to these states, emerging technologies like the Lucia Light No. 3 offer a unique, non-invasive pathway to altered awareness.

What is the Lucia Light No. 3?

The Lucia Light No. 3 is a hypnagogic light device designed to induce deep meditative states, altered consciousness, and visionary experiences through a combination of solid and flickering white light. Developed by Austrian neurologist Dr. Engelbert Winkler and psychologist Dr. Dirk Proeckl, this technology works by stimulating the pineal gland, activating the brain’s natural ability to produce psychedelic-like visuals without the need for substances.

As the light pulses at varying frequencies, users often report experiencing geometric patterns, vivid colors, and an overwhelming sense of peace, interconnectedness, and deep introspection.

How Does It Work?

The Lucia Light No. 3 operates by influencing the brain's electrical activity through photonic stimulation. This process encourages the production of alpha, theta, and gamma brainwaves, the same states associated with deep meditation, lucid dreaming, and mystical experiences.

  1. Alpha Brainwaves (8-12 Hz) – Relaxation, creativity, and light trance states.

  2. Theta Brainwaves (4-8 Hz) – Deep meditation, emotional processing, and access to the subconscious mind.

  3. Gamma Brainwaves (30-100 Hz) – Peak spiritual experiences, expanded awareness, and enhanced intuition.

By entraining the brain to oscillate at these frequencies, the light guides users into profound states of consciousness that might otherwise take years of disciplined meditation to achieve.

The Experience: What to Expect

Each person’s journey with the Lucia Light No. 3 is unique, as the light interacts with the individual's nervous system, thoughts, and energy field. However, common experiences include:

  • Visual Journeys: Intricate fractals, sacred geometry, and vibrant colors.

  • Deep Relaxation: A state of calm and presence, similar to a meditative trance.

  • Emotional Release: Unprocessed emotions or memories surfacing for healing.

  • Connection to the Infinite: A profound sense of unity, love, and expansion.

  • Creative Inspiration: Enhanced problem-solving, artistic insights, and visionary thinking.

Some compare the experience to a waking dream, while others feel it mimics deep breathwork or plant medicine journeys without the physical demands of traditional psychedelics.

Who Can Benefit from the Lucia Light No. 3?

This modality is for anyone seeking:

  • Spiritual Exploration: A safe way to access mystical states and deeper awareness.

  • Stress & Anxiety Reduction: The deeply relaxing effects help regulate the nervous system.

  • Enhanced Meditation & Mindfulness: Supports those struggling with traditional meditation.

  • Creativity & Innovation: Artists, writers, and entrepreneurs benefit from heightened inspiration.

  • Healing & Emotional Processing: Provides a gentle space for integration and personal growth.

Preparing for a Lucia Light Session

To get the most out of your experience, consider the following:

  • Set an Intention: Whether it's clarity, healing, or expansion, focus on your desired outcome.

  • Create a Comfortable Space: A peaceful setting with soft music enhances the journey.

  • Surrender to the Experience: Let go of expectations and allow the process to unfold naturally.

  • Integrate Afterward: Journaling, meditation, or breathwork can help ground and process insights.

Final Thoughts

The Lucia Light No. 3 is a powerful tool for exploring the depths of consciousness in a safe and accessible way. Whether you are seeking profound relaxation, inner wisdom, or an expansion of your awareness, this light experience offers a glimpse into the infinite potential of the mind.

If you’re curious about diving into your own inner universe, this might just be the next step on your journey of transformation.

Would you try the Lucia Light No. 3? Share your thoughts and experiences below!

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What Is Somatic Breathwork?

In our fast-paced world, finding effective methods to manage stress and promote holistic well-being is essential. One such practice gaining recognition is somatic breathwork.

In our fast-paced world, finding effective methods to manage stress and promote holistic well-being is essential. One such practice gaining recognition is somatic breathwork.

What is Somatic Breathwork?

Somatic breathwork is a therapeutic approach that combines controlled breathing techniques with heightened bodily awareness. The term "somatic" originates from the Greek word "soma," meaning "body," emphasizing the practice's focus on the mind-body connection. By consciously regulating breath patterns, individuals can influence their physical, emotional, and mental states, fostering overall well-being.

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  1. Improved Mental Clarity: Regular practice of somatic breathwork has been linked to better focus and cognitive function, aiding in mental clarity and decision-making.
    neurologyadvisor.com

  2. Physical Health Benefits: Conscious breathing techniques can positively impact respiratory function, blood pressure, and overall physical health.
    webmd.com

Who Can Benefit from Somatic Breathwork?

Somatic breathwork is versatile and can be beneficial for various individuals, including:

  • Those Experiencing Stress or Anxiety: Individuals looking to manage stress or anxiety may find relief through the calming effects of controlled breathing.

  • Individuals with Trauma Histories: Those seeking to process and heal from past traumas can use somatic breathwork as a gentle therapeutic tool.

  • Anyone Seeking Personal Growth: Individuals aiming to enhance self-awareness and personal development can benefit from the introspective nature of the practice.

Incorporating somatic breathwork into your routine can serve as a powerful tool for healing and personal transformation, fostering a harmonious connection between mind and body.

Schedule your session today !

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